To Michael Kwon,
wishing his recovery.
Preface
Since young, one of my favorite writing was poetry. However, it always seemed that I cannot get out of the structure of my childish poem. I didn’t have any chance to learn to write poetry, properly in class with a teacher before, so when I heard that we are going to write poetry, I couldn’t hide my joy. I waited and waited for the time to come, until I found out that we are not going to free-write our poems. “There were different ways to write poems?” that is exactly what I said. And at the same time, I liked the fresh challenge.
My best and most inspired work always came from my bedroom. Even though I try my best in the classroom to write something, all I can do for 70 minutes is to sit and write something unworthy. I always had to rewrite the things I wrote in class; not a single writing was left untouched. Bedroom is a place where my comforts are. I dream, I love, and I imagine the most beautiful things there. As I lie down, looking at the ceiling, I can think of all sorts of things without any worries. Maybe there is this idea-making-machine in my bed, the machine of ideas and dream.
Things that are mysterious, things that suddenly make me wonder, and things that give me unforgettable impressions inspire me the most. They make me think more deeply and see everything in different point of views, which leads to the creativity. For example, when I was in the bathroom, my friend and I were talking about how funny it is to stand in front of the door and listen to all those different sounds that are created, when I said, “This is it, for my sound poem!” The idea of the ‘Two Rooms’ narrative poem inspired me also. I was in an agony of choosing what I want to be when I grow up and what path I should walk on, when the poem compared two different things that were very contrasting. It came right into my heart, and I so wanted to compare two of my dreams this way.
I value the voice the most in the writing process. Every writer has one’s unique way of wording phrases and that could be the beauty of the person’s poem. The voice can decide who the poem is for, and the purpose of the poem. I am not really good at showing voice, and it is a category that I need to work on harder; however, I had tried my best. The most important thing I learned about writing poetry is the way to use all 6 traits of writing appropriately in different kinds of poems. I also learned how to describe something effectively. The poor description could kill the poem, so the word choices were really important, too. I hope as readers go through this portfolio, they could feel the beauty of poem. For those who don’t like poetry, I hope my poems can change their hatred into love.
Restroom
Audience: Elementary Children
Final draft
Sound Poem
“Bang! Bang!”
People beating the door.
“Me first! Me first!”
Shouts of people waiting
“Crash!”
The cry of the door
“Crash!”
The injury of the door
“Shhh~!” Listen!
There goes the flush!
As soon as the water sucks down,
People get ready for race.
“All done!” they say
With relief in their voices.
“Drip! Drip!”
The water drops are left
In their empty spaces.
Two Rooms of Dream
Audience: Young adults
Final draft
Narrative Poem
I live in a doorway
Between two rooms
In one room
I find my foot,
Tapping to the melody
My hand races down the string,
My arm dances in the air.
As I create my music,
I dream of the day
Finding myself on the stage
Being one of the greatest musicians
In another room
I find my hand,
Scribbling down the paper
My pencil starts to cry
My brain starts to beseech.
As I fill out each and every word
I dream of the day
Finding myself in court
Being one of the keenest prosecutors.
Lovely Fly
Audience: Young adults who hate flies.
Final draft
Process Poem
An angel,
With shining eyes
Staring at you with tears
Reflecting yourself
In a hundred points of view
Waiting for you to see itself
Landing on your food.
An angel,
With rainbow-colored wings
Flapping here and there
Searching for a place to land
A place to give you blessings
A blessing for you and me
A blessing of germs.
An angel,
With beautiful lips
Full of love for everyone
Kissing this and that
Finding for its true love
And, once it discovers you,
Kisses you with black lips.
Message is clear, focused, concise, and easy to summarize. It is very interesting to read the poem from the beginning because of the title. The readers get to think, "How can flies be lovely?" and start reading the poem. I compared the fly to an angel because I thought the angels were the most clean and beautiful thing there could ever be. I use pretty adjectives, that are usually used to make an object seem better and make the readers think of something in a positive point of view. However, as the fly is described more and more, it somehow makes the reader feel disgusted. The last line of every stanza is always a turn. Although it is the only line of the stanza that doesn't use pretty words, it makes the whole poem disgusting. Even I was disgusted by the idea of being kissed by a fly with a 'black lip.' This poem is not appropriate to read before reading, nor for the people who love flies, since their thoughts will change after reading the poem. One question that can come into mind is, "How can this be a process poem?" The answer is, as the readers have already felt, basically how to turn the positive point of view to negative toward the fly by reading the poem. The conventions are good, and the idea was really good. Even I was surprised at myself, how I could think of such topic!
The Very First Day
Audience: Young adults with experience of the first day of school.
Final draft
Pantoum
That day I was unprepared
The first step toward high school
Painful and harsh they declared
Armful of projects soaked with drool
The first step toward high school
Walking up and down the stairs
Armful of projects soaked with drool
Who cares about friend affairs?
Walking up and down the stairs
Everyone looks so worried and anxious,
Who cares about friend affairs?
Seeing teachers’ keen eyes checking who’s conscientious.
Everyone looks so worried and anxious
Painful and harsh they declared
Seeing teachers’ keen eyes checking who’s conscientious
That day I was unprepared.
Message is clear, focused, concise, and easy to summarize. This poem makes me think again of the first day of high school. Although time has passed, it makes me smile of the day. Adult readers, who have been in high school a long time ago, may have hard time to draw one's memoir out, but I am confident that it is a memory to enjoy thinking about. The description of the poem is done for the readers to enjoy, for example, the textbook soaked with drool makes you imagine when you were sleepy while studying. This poem contains my own experience, when I was really worried and anxious, hearing a senior say that it is a worst time of life to be in the high school. The readers could feel the tension of the first day. Your mind is full of thoughts of the tests that is coming up and how to prepare for the first test of the year. The grades you get from then go to college so no one is left behind. The conventions are good, and the word choices are well done. However, I think if the poem was longer, it could have been better. Overall, the Pantoum organization was in a good structure and was well written.
wishing his recovery.
Preface
Since young, one of my favorite writing was poetry. However, it always seemed that I cannot get out of the structure of my childish poem. I didn’t have any chance to learn to write poetry, properly in class with a teacher before, so when I heard that we are going to write poetry, I couldn’t hide my joy. I waited and waited for the time to come, until I found out that we are not going to free-write our poems. “There were different ways to write poems?” that is exactly what I said. And at the same time, I liked the fresh challenge.
My best and most inspired work always came from my bedroom. Even though I try my best in the classroom to write something, all I can do for 70 minutes is to sit and write something unworthy. I always had to rewrite the things I wrote in class; not a single writing was left untouched. Bedroom is a place where my comforts are. I dream, I love, and I imagine the most beautiful things there. As I lie down, looking at the ceiling, I can think of all sorts of things without any worries. Maybe there is this idea-making-machine in my bed, the machine of ideas and dream.
Things that are mysterious, things that suddenly make me wonder, and things that give me unforgettable impressions inspire me the most. They make me think more deeply and see everything in different point of views, which leads to the creativity. For example, when I was in the bathroom, my friend and I were talking about how funny it is to stand in front of the door and listen to all those different sounds that are created, when I said, “This is it, for my sound poem!” The idea of the ‘Two Rooms’ narrative poem inspired me also. I was in an agony of choosing what I want to be when I grow up and what path I should walk on, when the poem compared two different things that were very contrasting. It came right into my heart, and I so wanted to compare two of my dreams this way.
I value the voice the most in the writing process. Every writer has one’s unique way of wording phrases and that could be the beauty of the person’s poem. The voice can decide who the poem is for, and the purpose of the poem. I am not really good at showing voice, and it is a category that I need to work on harder; however, I had tried my best. The most important thing I learned about writing poetry is the way to use all 6 traits of writing appropriately in different kinds of poems. I also learned how to describe something effectively. The poor description could kill the poem, so the word choices were really important, too. I hope as readers go through this portfolio, they could feel the beauty of poem. For those who don’t like poetry, I hope my poems can change their hatred into love.
Restroom
Audience: Elementary Children
Final draft
Sound Poem
“Bang! Bang!”
People beating the door.
“Me first! Me first!”
Shouts of people waiting
“Crash!”
The cry of the door
“Crash!”
The injury of the door
“Shhh~!” Listen!
There goes the flush!
As soon as the water sucks down,
People get ready for race.
“All done!” they say
With relief in their voices.
“Drip! Drip!”
The water drops are left
In their empty spaces.
Two Rooms of Dream
Audience: Young adults
Final draft
Narrative Poem
I live in a doorway
Between two rooms
In one room
I find my foot,
Tapping to the melody
My hand races down the string,
My arm dances in the air.
As I create my music,
I dream of the day
Finding myself on the stage
Being one of the greatest musicians
In another room
I find my hand,
Scribbling down the paper
My pencil starts to cry
My brain starts to beseech.
As I fill out each and every word
I dream of the day
Finding myself in court
Being one of the keenest prosecutors.
Lovely Fly
Audience: Young adults who hate flies.
Final draft
Process Poem
An angel,
With shining eyes
Staring at you with tears
Reflecting yourself
In a hundred points of view
Waiting for you to see itself
Landing on your food.
An angel,
With rainbow-colored wings
Flapping here and there
Searching for a place to land
A place to give you blessings
A blessing for you and me
A blessing of germs.
An angel,
With beautiful lips
Full of love for everyone
Kissing this and that
Finding for its true love
And, once it discovers you,
Kisses you with black lips.
Message is clear, focused, concise, and easy to summarize. It is very interesting to read the poem from the beginning because of the title. The readers get to think, "How can flies be lovely?" and start reading the poem. I compared the fly to an angel because I thought the angels were the most clean and beautiful thing there could ever be. I use pretty adjectives, that are usually used to make an object seem better and make the readers think of something in a positive point of view. However, as the fly is described more and more, it somehow makes the reader feel disgusted. The last line of every stanza is always a turn. Although it is the only line of the stanza that doesn't use pretty words, it makes the whole poem disgusting. Even I was disgusted by the idea of being kissed by a fly with a 'black lip.' This poem is not appropriate to read before reading, nor for the people who love flies, since their thoughts will change after reading the poem. One question that can come into mind is, "How can this be a process poem?" The answer is, as the readers have already felt, basically how to turn the positive point of view to negative toward the fly by reading the poem. The conventions are good, and the idea was really good. Even I was surprised at myself, how I could think of such topic!
The Very First Day
Audience: Young adults with experience of the first day of school.
Final draft
Pantoum
That day I was unprepared
The first step toward high school
Painful and harsh they declared
Armful of projects soaked with drool
The first step toward high school
Walking up and down the stairs
Armful of projects soaked with drool
Who cares about friend affairs?
Walking up and down the stairs
Everyone looks so worried and anxious,
Who cares about friend affairs?
Seeing teachers’ keen eyes checking who’s conscientious.
Everyone looks so worried and anxious
Painful and harsh they declared
Seeing teachers’ keen eyes checking who’s conscientious
That day I was unprepared.
Message is clear, focused, concise, and easy to summarize. This poem makes me think again of the first day of high school. Although time has passed, it makes me smile of the day. Adult readers, who have been in high school a long time ago, may have hard time to draw one's memoir out, but I am confident that it is a memory to enjoy thinking about. The description of the poem is done for the readers to enjoy, for example, the textbook soaked with drool makes you imagine when you were sleepy while studying. This poem contains my own experience, when I was really worried and anxious, hearing a senior say that it is a worst time of life to be in the high school. The readers could feel the tension of the first day. Your mind is full of thoughts of the tests that is coming up and how to prepare for the first test of the year. The grades you get from then go to college so no one is left behind. The conventions are good, and the word choices are well done. However, I think if the poem was longer, it could have been better. Overall, the Pantoum organization was in a good structure and was well written.
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